Jokes Cracked by Lord Aberdeen
The great-aunt died and I inspected her house. Irish linens never opened, a congealed wedding
bouquet in a bell jar, a significant issue of the Taranaki Herald in the jersey drawer. In the news
that day, there was rugby club war. You can either sort it out or biff it out, someone said to me,
carrying out a box of silver. A table made of the old back fence, a portrait of her granduncle,
the eyes coloured in with red biro. The whiskey smell of oak cabinets. In the realm of wit and
humour, Lord Aberdeen is a force to conjure with. Here the publishers have great pleasure in
introducing to the public a few of his gems. I kept a vase with a bullet hole in it and left the
Listen to Stefanie Lash read ‘Jokes Cracked by Lord Aberdeen‘
Love, conquerors of (world exceedingly dark)
derived from the look of a pansy
trodden into a puddle
viewed from the bottom of the pool
a caption at home with her horse
the dog circles me round
with a gold briefcase)
Listen to Stefanie Lash read ‘Love, conquerors of (world exceedingly dark)’
Yes, he gave me a suitcase
filled with diamonds.
I chose some. I felt ornery.
applied potato poultice
to the bruises on my legs.
on my calf, either leg,
from walking into the bed.
had a button fly.
For such a big man
he had very thin ankles.
The furniture was upholstered
in pubic hair. I was indignant.
when my hands were always
finely cut. That wasn’t a dream.
Listen to Stefanie Lash read ‘Tom Cruise‘
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Stefanie Lash has just completed her MA at the IIML, where she put together a collection of poems called President Brie. Her poetry has previously appeared in Takahe, Turbine and Poetry NZ. Just for the record, she thinks Tom Cruise is gross.